I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize