Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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