you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize