I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
