This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
