Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
