You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
