Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize