Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
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