the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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