question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
