apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
