Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i just made my gag reflex go away.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
