Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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