Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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