stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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