Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
