He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
