But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize