and you said cock pushups were impossible
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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