Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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