I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
