he was CRYING into my vagina
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
