i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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