Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
