Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
