If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
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