it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize