Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize