just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize