Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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