Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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