Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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