At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
