I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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