If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
