I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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