I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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