im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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