I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
