I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
