So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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