Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
