puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
