who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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