hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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