sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
