They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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