Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
