I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
